Lorna Easterbrook
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St Ives

The original 'St Ives' verse is used to confuse small children. That's because it's a riddle, where the answer is not whether you can multiply by 7, multiple times, but whether you've realised that the answer is given in the first line 'As I was going to St Ives' to the question posed by the final line 'How many were going to St Ives'? (Ans = 1).

Mostly to amuse myself, I occasionally write alternative 'St Ives' rhymes. Here are a few for you ...



As I was going to St Ives,
I met a man with seven lives.
Each life had seven hats.
Each hat had seven gnats.
I gave him a wide berth.


As I was going to St Ives,
I met a man with seven knives.
I decided to go to Oldham instead.


As I was going to St Ives,
I met a man with breath like chives:
He smelled so bad, I gave him mint -
I wish, I wish, he'd take the hint.


As I was going to St Ives,
I met a man with feet like hives:
Blessed that heat confused the bees,
His tootsies safe when smelled of cheese.


AND - probably safest to say 'Adults Only' for the next one (so, if you're not an adult, stop reading immediately. There. I can't do much more than that):

For all the pleasure that derives
From sharing versions of St Ives,
It never tops my finding
"PhoneAds" -
A perfect rhyming word for Gonads.


:-)



© Lorna Easterbrook 2016-2022 All Rig
hts Reserved
Top image: Front cover for 'Book of Nonsense' made by Lorna: leather and fabric on leather (with apologies to vegan readers)

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  • Home
  • About
  • What's New?
  • Writing
    • Novels
    • Flash Fiction
    • Jackanory
    • Museum Girl
    • St Ives
    • Dr Dog
  • Storytelling
    • Daisies
    • Beige
  • Photo films
  • Contact
  • Consultancy